


Repercussions

by Meraki1



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Humor, Character Death, M/M, Male Slash, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-20
Updated: 2017-10-28
Packaged: 2018-12-17 13:57:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11853003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meraki1/pseuds/Meraki1
Summary: Repercussions- sounds heavy, right? It's even heavier in practical life. Life is the greatest teacher they say because in real life you can't hide from the consequences of your actions. (SLASH)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Ahh…I want to but unfortunately I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT!
> 
> A/N: Hey! So I wanted to write something with our favorite Jakeward, so here it is. Before you read the story:
> 
> 1\. It's an AU fiction- it starts before the Newmoon.
> 
> 2\. As an alpha wolf (only in wolf form), Jacob can connect to anyone's mind.
> 
> 3\. Yes, Edward is a mind reader but he can also project his thoughts into other's minds- but there's a price Edward pays for his extraordinary power and you will have to find that out your self.
> 
> 4\. Vampires and shapeshifters in this story are different from that of Meyer's.
> 
> It's not a purely a romance story, so you may or may not like the ending but still, I have tried my best and I hope you like my story enough to overlook my mistakes and not so ideal ending. AND most importantly I want to thank my sweet beta ShineNRise for helping me. I love you!
> 
> Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Edward's pov**

**"Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart, and the senses" – Lao Tzu**

I always longed for someone to share my life with but due to my curse -  _some may call this a gift_ , I never found anyone whom I can live with forever. I was changed by Carlisle, my adoptive father, and a vampire, in 1918 after my dying mother somehow found about Carlisle's secret and asked to save me from the Spanish Influenza. I am still not fully okay with his reasoning for changing me, but I can't hate Carlisle, he's always supported me and because of him, I have this beautiful family. As fate had decided I was damned to this existence with one more curse, the ability to read minds-  _yeah, I can read minds and project my thoughts into someone else's mind too. Amazing, right? Not so much as I pay a solid price for it._

My ability came in between whenever I tried to be with someone, it was tiring. With all the things years passed and I remained alone and miserable, with every new year it was like my mind was covered with a darkness, it was frightening. I knew that if that darkness persisted on growing on me, I will end up destroying everything in and around me. I tried to run away from it, but in the end, I came back to Carlisle more injured than before. I think Carlisle knew this too, and in a desperate effort to help me he came home with Rose one day, after our first meeting, more accurately our first fight we all knew how wrong and disastrous that plan was. But after that, our family grew with Emmett, Jasper, and Alice, and I am still secretly grateful that Rosalie joined us, but I will never admit it in front of Rose.

My vampire family 'the Cullens' with Carlisle the compassionate leader- our father, Esme the binding glue- our mother, Jasper the Empath- protective big brother, Alice the little seer- my partner in crime, Emmett the brute clown, Rosalie the beautiful tantrum queen and lastly me, Edward the annoying mind reader is unique and strong. But somehow, I am always considered the youngest member… the one who is fussed over. While it's irritating as hell, I don't hate it-  _that doesn't mean I like it._

Carlisle works as a doctor and we all play the part of a normal family, by going school and doing other normal things. Since Esme and Carlisle look very young we are their adoptive children. In my coven I am the only one without a mate or partner-  _I know it's pathetic_  and while living with three couples, it's really hard to avoid those dark and empty feelings, that's why when Chief Swan's daughter, Bella Swan, who was also my singer as Carlisle had said-  _her blood called to me_ , came stumbling into the town of Forks, I was disoriented to the core. Our coven was  _vegetarian_  as we liked to call us because we learned to control our thirst for human blood and instead fed from animal blood. With her blood, Bella lured me into her and I became wildly obsessed after I discovered that I couldn't read her mind.

I was in love with her mind, and after talking to her, I started liking her human flaws-  _as Rosalie calls it_. It felt like I have finally found 'the one'… as I think about it now it feels silly that I took my obsession for her as love.

I know it now. Actually, I think I realized it the second I saw  _him._ With Bella, it was all about overcoming my darkness, but with him, nothing mattered. The moment I saw him I lost all my logic and rationality, it was almost as if I was human again, even the blood pulsing around me didn't matter.

Jacob Black was something else, I still remember when a 16-year-old native boy with long and messy raven hair came bustling into our prom and boldly told me that he wants Bella. Moreover, I, Edward Cullen was speechless for the first time in his vampiric existence, after that I behaved like a typical teenager with flushed face and an aggressive cover to hide my inner turmoil, he only laughed and said he just wanted to talk to his 'Bells', after relating us Billy's message cum warning he told Bella to enjoy the evening with a boyish smile. I was uncomfortable and annoyed, Bella told me to 'calm down' but the only thought I was conscious of was 'he called her -  _his bells_ '.

After that prom incident somehow Bella and I started drifting away, maybe because she started developing an independent character or perhaps because I was no longer in delusion… umm, love with her. We used to fight like crazy and just like that, one day Bella asked me to break-up with her. I was shocked, but truthfully, somewhere I was relieved too. Bella wanted us to remain friends though, and she asked me to act as her boyfriend until the graduation. I wasn't supportive of the idea, but after she talked about our friend's and family's reactions, I too agreed with the plan. I never knew that Bella was gifted with the art of manipulation, but then again, I was always blind when it came to her. It was decided that we will act our parts and find a way to end our rather highlighted relationship in the least destructive way.

Jasper was the first one who saw through our farce and with Alice confronted us in a kind but stern way. Jasper was surprisingly understanding and supportive of our decision, Alice was devastated at first, but after a little coaxing and push from Jasper, came around the idea of us separating. She was the one who suggested letting in Rose and Emmett in our decision; I was worried about Rosalie's reaction because she was against our relationship from the start. I was worried that she will make a big argument about this.

Yes, I wanted to tell my parents about this, but only after finding the right way, Carlisle suffered very much for my sake, with all my mood swings, rogue vampire danger and family problems he was the one who took in all the heat of my actions directly and indirectly. While I know he will support me in the end, it is just that I want to give him a proper reason for my past stupidity and this decision.

When we told Rosalie and Emmett about our decision, again, I was surprised when Rose said 'Well, at least now you are doing the right thing.' Emmett was a little hurt that I thought they will not support me and yet again I wondered about how lucky I was to get such a supportive family. And with gratitude, I was once again full of guilt about my inability to give my family the love and happiness they deserved.

With time, my relation with Bella mended up into a healthy and strong friendship. We were close, closer than ever before, I still confine into her to escape the ever present darkness. With our relationship end, Bella became more social and started hanging out with others, including Jacob and other natives, I don't exactly know how or when but with time Jacob became my rivals for Bella's love, one of my theory is because he is near the maturing age, the maturing age for the transformation. The natives are actually our mortal enemies, they call themselves as shapeshifters and they possess the ability to transform into a conscious beast, they resemble a big sized wolf but unlike them, they have a human mind. I never fought with him for Bella, but because I wanted him to acknowledge me, and I am not saying it with malice, but Bella enjoys the show, and since the only way to talk with him is Bella I play along with her.

I am sure that after the transformation everything, including the rivalry would reach the top. I don't want Jacob to hate me, but I know that he will never love me, in the beginning, I was not very sure and thought that it's just a phase but with time I fell in love with my stupid mutt. Jacob doesn't know this but I call him mutt only because I can't call him Jake, so I gave him a nickname of my own. No one knows about my feelings for him, I think that Jasper is aware of my turmoil but hasn't said anything yet.

I was still lost in thoughts when familiar footsteps of Bella brought me back to my reality, even now sometimes I can't help my thirst. Sighing, I opened my bedroom's door. With a furious face, Bella entered in and plopped down on the couch with a thump.

"That damn guy, why is he doing this?" she said with a flustered face, I had no choice but to stop inhaling her tempting and sweet scent, it's very uncomfortable, but as usual I kept on my poker face and pretended that she was not there.

"Edward! Come on, now you are too avoiding me." she huffed, OK, I think this is something serious.

With a deep sigh, I can't help it, with years of breathing practice is now natural to us and it's very uncomfortable to hold it like that… I will have to suffer from the smell, how someone can smell so good, I am sure even heaven can't smell so deliciously sweet…Nooo! What am I… "Seriously, are you even listening to me?" Bella said with a pained expression, Ha! I should be the one with that expression.

Sigh, I think she's already irritated enough, I shouldn't add to her foul mood, "What happened, Bella?" this made her calm down slightly.

"Jake is avoiding me for the last 2 weeks, I know he's hiding under the guise of being sick!" she said while kicking the rug with the usual 'Bella face'.

"Maybe you are just overreacting," I said, because I know why he's avoiding her. The reason why Jacob Black is avoiding his precious 'Bells' is that now he's officially a mutt.

"Edward why are you snickering like that?" she said with an annoyed yet surprised look.

"Nothing I just remembered something," I said in a dismissive tone, "anyway I think that Jacob is really sick, give him some time, he will come around." She gazed at me strangely.

"What?" I asked while racking my hands through my hair.

**"** You called him Jacob?" she said with a rather stupid expression.

"Yes… I mean his name is Jacob right." I said trying to cover my slip. "Since he's your friend and I have nothing against him in reality, I mean it's not like we are really dating or anything."

She winced at the mention of our fake relationship but her suspicion is somewhat cleared about my unusual behavior, Damn I am turning into a foolish teenager due to that mutt.

"Oh…OK, you are right, I was just surprised when you took his side." She said with an awkward shrug and peachy smile.

"Great, now should we proceed with the main problem here?" I said in an attempt to take her mind from my blunder.

"Yeah, as I said Jake is avoiding me on purpose, and before you say anything I am sure that he's hiding something so please don't tell me that I am panicking for nothing. This is serious and yes a mere human like me can sense it." She said in an unusually calm voice, like me.

I couldn't help but smile, it's a small thing, but yet very significant for someone like me. Unlike humans, change in a vampire is a complex process. We don't change like humans. However, we try to keep our prominent human traits after entering into this cursed side of the world, well at least my family is trying to keep their humanity with them. Bella and I share a close relationship and I can admit that we have grown on each other; Bella has picked up my defensive side while I have picked up some of her caring nature. At least I think I have.

"Edward, are you sure you are all right?" she said again bringing me out of my mind, her face is somewhat of pain, anger, and concern, "I am fine," I said with a practiced conviction in my voice.

With my reply, she went back into telling me about how Jacob is avoiding her and how she's trying to hold onto his whereabouts with no success. She is worried about him, well if I was at her place, I would have gone crazy too. Okay, I think I should help her but how? Hmm… if I could reach Jacob and tell him about Bella's condition, I am sure he will contact her if he can see how miserable Bella is after his mysterious disappearance, at least he can comfort her through a phone. While I know that those wolves will never hurt Bella or any human for that matter, I also know that young wolves are volatile in nature and sometimes they can be dangerous, when provoked or stimulated they lose their temper and transform into a giant wolf and during that process they can hurt anyone around them accidentally.

I was lost again in my thoughts when I heard something, with my left hand I caught the pillow thrown at me and heard Bella muttering:

"Stupid vampire senses." I couldn't help but laugh at that, who knew out of all people I would be attacked by Bella and that too with a pillow.

"I am terrified Bella, how can you attack an innocent vampire like that. OMG Humans are so violent." With that, Bella fell down into a fit of laughter; yeah I have also picked few things from a certain wolf. Since she's missing that mutt, I thought that I should do something like him… I am happy my plan worked, seeing Bella happy like that makes me happy too. I wish I could do same with…

"Jesus Edward what was that?" she finally asked while still giggling a little, "Thanks, I know I am whining like a spoiled kid but I am really worried for him," she said with a sad expression.

"I can understand that you are worried about him but Bella, you should believe him and as I said earlier give him a little space and time, I am sure he will come back to you," I said while keeping my tone steady and calm, I was ok with Jacob wanting Bella but still sometimes, it's difficult to control my feelings. Nevertheless, I know that he hates me from the core of his heart and it hurts that the person I love probably hates me more than he loves anyone. Well, I can't change that but I can help him with Bella, I just want him to be happy. Moreover, I don't think there's anyone better than Bella for my mutt, I genuinely care for them both and I can live with the fact that they are together I can accept them together.

"I... I think you are right." She said with a pensive expression.

She is hurting from inside just like him, that stupid mutt he was like a persistent pest before and now when she needs him he is hiding just because he's different. At least he can still give her everything, and if he wants he can stop phasing after some time and live like a normal human with his 'Bells'. He can have all the happiness in the world and I will always be there for them, I will make sure they live a peaceful and wealthy life. I know I can't stay with them but I can watch them from the shadows, it will be so great to see them grow and have things I can't… I will also get a chance to be a part of those things with them even if only from afar. Mostly I want to see small Jacob and Bella, it's something I have always wished for but since it's not possible I had buried those desires with everything inside me. Now with them, I can experience those things even if in the smallest way possible. I know it will hurt to watch them grow and move on without me at some point, but I am ready to take that pain, Jacob's worth it.

I held myself in the past because I didn't want to interfere with their feelings, but I can't see my close friend and that stupid mutt-  _my love,_ suffering just because they can't come forward with their feelings. If a little push from my side could bring them their happiness, then this is what I will do. With that thought, I gathered all my feelings, locked them up in a corner and with all my determination and spirit looked up into Bella's eyes and said:

"Bella Swan, are you in love with Jacob Black?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Repercussions- sounds heavy right? It's even heavier in practical life. Life is the greatest teacher they say because in real life you can't hide from the consequences of your actions. (SLASH)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Ahh…I want to but unfortunately I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT!
> 
> A/N: Okay so here's the next chapter.
> 
> Before reading though:
> 
> 1\. "I like slash fanfictions."- verbal dialogues
> 
> 2\. 'I am obsessed with slash fanfictions'(italics) – internal dialogues
> 
> 3\. All the mistakes present in this chapter are mine, I will upload the beta edited version as soon as possible.

 

**Epov**

**I still own my heart, which I know because it hurts so much - Emilie Autumn**

Her eyes became wide as saucers, it was comical but it's difficult to laugh when your heart feels like heavy ice. Funny, after my transformation and those last three slow and painful beats I was sure that I would never feel that part of my anatomy, I think that the ever present emptiness in our hearts, is the perfect consequence to make us realize the significance of our actions, the accurate price for immortality, but today I can feel my heart, cause it's burning once again, because it hurts to admit that I will never have the one I love.

It feels like there is something heavy on my chest as I prepared to destroy myself with what I wanted to do.

However, I am determined, I will help him get everything he wants, and I will make sure he lives a long and happy life.

"Wh- what are you saying Edward?" She stuttered, after recovering from the initial shock, she is so normal and human.

"I asked you about your feeling for Jacob," I replied, maybe in a bit coldly.

She looked taken aback with my blunt attitude and unusual 'cold exterior', I instantly regretted talking to her like that and promised myself to not to repeat this ever again.

"Umm...I like him as a friend?" She said with an awkward smile. I wanted to tease and probe her for more, but I knew she would close up if I pushed her or made fun of her like that.

"Okay, If that's the case, then I can tell you the real reason why Jacob is avoiding you." I said.

"What? yo- you know why he's avoiding me?" She asked and with a slight nod I continued.

"Are you sure you want to know this?" I asked and in return got a hesitant nod, "I am warning you, after this I am sure everything between you and Jacob will change…" I said and I know, believe me, I know, just how dramatic I sounded right now, God, am I really turning into a dramatic teenager.

"Edward." She said with a calm expression and steady glare; see _-she is behaving like my female version, a cute and innocent female version._

"Hey now, I was just giving you a warning, as your extraordinary boyfriend, it's my duty, you know, I have an image to maintain." I could see her lips twitching in response, after running my hands through my hair I continued, "Jacob is seeing a girl." I covered my mouth before she could suspect my smirk.

I wanted to click a picture of her facial expression, she looked like I had just kicked her puppy... Well, I just told her that someone stole her puppy… Dear Lord, high school is ruining me, I am sounding like a chic… urm girl. I looked up, and cherished my poker face; because internally I was laughing like a maniac. Poor girl, it was clear as day that she's in love with Jacob, why is she suppressing her feelings like that, maybe because of her lack of judgement with our relationship she's is not sure with her emotions, that's why my first obstacle is to make her realize her love for Jacob.

And one thing that everyone should know is that nothing matters to me when it comes to my loved ones, I will do anything to make them happy.

"Are you okay?" I asked her, I could see that she was about to cry.

"I- I am fine. I just remembered that I have a report to complete, thank you for telling me about Jacob… I was just being stupid, I can't believe it." She said while controlling her tears, I felt bad for doing this to her, but this was for her own good.

"How did you find out about this?" She asked.

"I bumped into him accidentally, the girl was with him, and out courtesy and curiosity, I shook her hands and found that she was there with him for a date. Later Jacob asked me to keep mum about this as he wants to tell you that personally." I lied smoothly.

"Oh…" was the only reply I got.

"Bella, please don't mention this in front of Jacob it's actually his place to tell you about her. That's why I am not telling you anything else about that girl of his." I am really impressed with her control, I can feel that she's hurting and on verge of crying, "I think, because of our history and his obvious crush on you, he is hiding his new 'love' interest, you know out of insecurity and embarrassment. Maybe he wanted to make a good first impression in front of that girl." I said with a mock pity on my face.

"I must say though, Jacob has a nice taste, that girl was really beautiful." I said and I could see the jealousy rolling out her I waves, even I was uncomfortable with the prospect of Jacob with someone else… how ridiculous is that, I mean I know Jacob isn't seeing anyone and still I am jealous.

"Don't worry, I will not say anything about this to anyone." She said and made her way to my door, sigh, I know she's hurt and probably will feel miserable, but I let her go, simply because she needs to figure this out and I can't think anything else that will work this great. This temporary pain will ensure her a happy future.

Now I will have to just deal with that stupid mutt… Hmm… I think I will need my little minx of a sister here.

I took out my phone and dialled her number, "Hey, Ally sis, I need your help." I said in a tone that I know she couldn't refuse, well; there are few perks when you are considered the family's baby boy. While this is embarrassing for me on many levels, I am not above using it to my advantage.

"Oh? I mean, how I can help my little Eddie pooh," calm down Edward you will have to do this.

"Actually, I wanted you to find out Jacob Black's personal contact number and Email address." I said.

"May I ask, Why?" She said in a strange tone.

I knew she would ask for the details before helping me, and I also know that I can trust her with my life, "I want to help Jacob and Bella." I said and no, there's nothing like solemn in my voice.

"You want to play matchmaker," she stated dryly.

"Stop acting like Rose, and yes, I want to help them." I said while clutching my T-shirt and biting my lips-  _another gifted attribute from Bella._

"Edward, you know I will help you, but please remember that you too have a life." She said softly and I can understand what's she saying here, but she isn't aware of the degree of hatred and hostility Jacob have against me, I really want him, an us, but I can't have what I want.

"Don't worry Ally cat I will be fine." I said, I am not sure about myself, but I don't want her to worry about me anymore than she does every day. My family, including Rose is very protective of me whether they show it or not. I know that everyone counting Carlisle and Esme, are worried about me. I don't know for sure, but I think that my parents somehow know about my situation… maybe I am just over-reacting, but they are guarding their thoughts from me for a while now. I can still extract information from their mind very easily, but I am above probing someone else's mind without their consent.

"Edward I- I want to just tell you that I am with you, you can always count on me in spite of any situation… Ok?" Alice said.

"I know and I am grateful for that." I said and I don't know why, but I just wanted to tell her everything, maybe because I can't handle all this without something steady by my side anymore or maybe because I want someone to keep me from breaking into pieces before completing this job. Whatever it is, I just want my sister by my side before clearing this hormonal mess.

"Ally, I want to tell you something, it's about me. And I want you to promise me first that no matter what, you will not share this with anyone, not even Jasper." I said in a pleading yet demanding manner.

"I promise not tell anyone Ed" came her sincere reply, so she knows something about it already, or else she would have forced me to talk more about it before promising.

"Thanks… How about doing this at the meadow?" I asked.

"I will be there, and don't worry, I will handle everything." She said. I thanked her again before ending the call; I am feeling nervous yet confident about it.

I know what I should be doing next, but still I am nervous about it, I can't decide whether it's a good or a bad idea. I know that it'll hurt a lot and I would have to betray people's trust while executing my plan I will have to do it-  _and really I am lying just to help them, it's for the right cause,_  sighing at my own ridiculousness I started running towards my meadow.

Yes, it's true that I am not happy with this damned existence, but I can't deny that I love running, I am faster than most of the vampires, maybe I am the fastest vampire on earth but I can't say that for sure. My speed is the only thing I love about myself. Before I could think any further I saw Alice sitting in the middle of my beautiful meadow, I was surprised to see her here before me, I mean how can she reach here before me. I was still mulling over the fact when she turned towards me and touched her mind. I was confused at first, but before I could ask anything, it clicked -  _of course, how I could forget; my sis here is a seer after all. With that, we both started chuckling at my stupidity._

"You know with your high IQ and 'I am smart' talks, you are very slow sometimes." She said while throwing an annoying and superior smirk at me.

"What? It's just that my mind is occupied right now." I said defensively.

"And why is that?" She asked with a raised eyebrow, she definitely knows something.

"You tell me first." I replied with crossed arms and as much authority I could muster.

" _Sigh_ , I saw you asking me to come here, and then your future became hazy so I know it's related to those dogs." She was weighing my response, "Edward you know after you told us about breaking up with Bella, you looked pained, happy, and dare I say relieved at the same time. I have also noticed your open display of emotions" I interrupted her with my confused look and she frowned at me openly before continuing, "remember that day when we were talking about those dogs the other day you actually growled when Emmett joked about killing Jacob." She said while I cursed myself for making a mistake that obvious, I can't do such things if I want to keep my feelings for him a secret, but then again Alice is very close to me and it's natural that she noticed such reactions and other changes in my behavior.

"I know I was somewhat blind about Bella, but that doesn't mean I don't know you Edward, you are my best friend, one of my closest family member… my brother," she said sadly, "I am still sorry for not noticing the changes Edward, I should have noticed the change in your future." She looked so sad that I wanted to smack myself for making her say and feel those things.

"It wasn't your fault Ally, it was me who took my sheer obsession for love, it was my entire fault," I wanted to continue, but grew quiet with Alice's 'shut up or I will smack you' stare.

"Stop that bullshit Edward!" she said harshly and I flinched because of her sudden fury, and probably because of my reaction she relaxed her stance instantly, after giving me a guilty smile she continued, "It wasn't completely your fault and if you don't want me to smack the hell out of you, better start talking right this instant." She said in a deadly voice and I am wise enough to not to question her patience. I still remember Emmett's painful groans after he hid one of Alice's favourite shoes as a prank. Emmett never tried anything like that again.

"I- I am in… I think Jacob's my mate," with an irritated sigh, she narrowed her eyes at me, "I mean I am sure that he is my destined mate." I already knew that, but confessing it so openly in front of someone else-  _specially in front of Alice, my family._

Felt so good and exhilarating.

With an appreciative smile and happy eyes Alice started, "When you said you don't love Bella anymore, I knew there was more behind your decision than sudden realization." She finished and gave me another loving smile. I should have told her in the beginning, but I was not sure at that time.

"I am sorry, I know I should have told you before, but I was just too shocked with all the proceedings that I just kept all the things closed. It was easy and bearable that way." I said with pleading eyes.

"I know Ed, and I am sorry too. As your sister I should have supported you instead of dissecting your decisions." Light smell of sunshine and small arms of my big sister surrounded me- _it felt nice and safe._

"Okay now, if you can then please explain the reason behind your stupid sacrifice, I swear Ed you are a masochist." She said in a taunting tone while I bristled, sigh, I know she means well, but- "Edward darling if you know that I mean well then you should listen to me more often." She said as she came back in her usual cheery-  _and creepy self._  I swear she's a mind reader too.

"Ally I am doing this for the sake of my bond with him, you know I can't help but do what's best for him. You and I both know that Bella is best for him, they are in l-love with each other, but are hiding their feelings because both of them are dumb and stubborn-" I was interrupted by Alice's sarcastic scoff and internal _'just like you'_  and other not so kind comments. I pretended that I didn't hear her commentary and with a frustrated glare, completed my rudely interrupted sentence, "-humans."

With a hard glare and levelled tone Alice said, "Ed just to remind you, Jacob is anything but human, in fact, except for the fact that they defend humanity with a thumping heart they he is just like us feral and inhuman." She finished with her victory smirk, and I made sure to give her my best scowl.

 _'Awe, he looks so cute_!' I huffed with disappointment and annoyance. Oh God, why is my sister so annoying?

"Come on Eddie pooh, you know I am just teasing ya." She said innocently.

 _'I wasn't lying though you are cute.'_  Argh! She's is just malicious an- and crude. _'Now- now, Ed stop pouting, it makes me want to pinch your cheeks. My little brother is just so cute'_  she snickered. She is teasing me on purpose.

"Stop it Alice you know I can't block you like that." I whined.-Yeah, while I can block all the other voices with ease, I can't block Alice that effectively. Maybe it's because of our close bond.

"Okay, so have you found the details I asked you about?" I asked for diverging her attention and my dignity. With a nod in she drew out a piece of paper with all the details about Jacob Black. I was grateful and thanked Alice for her efforts and she smiled.

 _'At least give it a chance Edward, you never know what will happen for sure without trying.'_ The whispered thought echoed in my mind before Alice disappeared completely.

After musing about all, the fact once more and making useless excuses for not calling Jacob, I finally told myself to man up and call him. It felt like eternity before the first ring and at the first ring, I was sure I heard my heart start beating once again, after the third ring, I was tempted to disconnect the call, forget about all the things and leave for Hawaii for a eternity long vacation, but just like the other times my fate has other plans:

"Hello!" A gruff voice answered from the other end.

All the air and rational thoughts left my body and I said the rashest thing in the history of vampire and probably human.

"I love you!" And after that I did the next most logical thing I could think of, I crushed the vexatious devise in my hand and threw it as far as possible. It took me a moment, but I realized that I just told Jacob Black, my secret love and mortal enemy that I love him and also that I am totally screwed.

"Fucking Hell!" I shouted while pulling my hair with all my anger and other suppressed emotion, there was this ache in my chest and I just wanted to curl up and cry out all of these raging emotions. But of course, I couldn't. 


	3. Help!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A BETA READER NEEDED FOR THIS STORY.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry you will still get the next chapter on Thursday.

Hey! I am in need of a beta reader who can fix my punctuation and grammar blunders on weekly basis. I will be uploading a chapter per week, so you will get about 3-2 days for the editing,  while I know sometimes life happens - sadly we are only humans,  I need a someone regular for this.   
  
PROS

1\. You will get to read the chapter in advance.   
  
CONS

1\. You will have to bear with my writing blunders.

2\. You will only get 2-3 days for the editing.

3\. You will probably have to listen to my rantings.

4\. Sometimes I just get into those 'I am not sure' phases so, it would be really helpful for me if you could tell me if the chapter or plot sucks.

  
So if you want to to a pre-reader/ beta reader for this story,  let me know.   
  
Anxiously waiting for the reply.   
  
P.S. - I think I shouldn't have mentioned the pros and cons, I just can't find the pros part there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Help me! *Jacob's puppy dog eyes*


	4. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Ahh…I want to but unfortunately I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT!
> 
> A/N: Tada! Here's the new chapter!
> 
> Okay, so I really need a beta reader who can combat with my serious punctuation and grammar blunders on weekly basis.
> 
> After reading the chapter you will notice the dramatically improved punctuations, for that, all the credit goes to ThePsychoVamp- she's simply awesome. A great writer with equally awesome personality.

**EPOV**

**"Anyone who loves in the expectation of being loved in return is wasting their time." – Paulo Coelho**

I was still shocked and somewhat dizzy when Alice carried me home in bridal style. And after some lectures, I was forced to feed by Esme; I just couldn't get over the disastrous call with Jacob. I am mortified and utterly terrified about confronting him. I need some time, anything before that meeting; I need to compose myself before clearing things with Jacob.

~o0o~

I still don't know what to do. I haven't talked to anyone after coming back that day, and it's been a week since that disaster. I just can't decide anything. Everyone, including Bella, have tried to talk to me, but to no avail. I just can't talk about it, so instead, I stay locked up in my room. I know perfectly well that I am brooding and, trust me, I am not very happy about this, but it's not easy even for a century-old vampire to overcome embarrassment like that. Considering the mood and situation around me, I am pretty sure that Jacob hasn't revealed anything to anyone, and while I should be glad about that, the truth is that I am not.

Yes, I was freaked out about Bella, but I am losing it with Jacob.

Is he ashamed of me? I don't want him to hate me anymore than he does already.  _Sigh_. This is really fucked up. Why is my life this complicated all of a sudden? I wished to have a mate for more than a century and when I finally got my wish, I landed up with none other than my mortal enemy. _Talk about the tragedy..._  I prayed for my mate to be more human, and voila… He  _is_  human. Well, fifty percent human. And to add in to my extraordinary luck, he's a male. And on top of that, according to his lineage, he's an alpha male-  _well, more aptly an alpha wolf. But doesn't that makes me his bit… umm submissive._  I know that it doesn't matter seeing how repulsed he is by my existence, but a man can dream can't he?

God is definitely punishing me.

I was still brooding when my door burst open. Wow… I didn't hear anyone coming. Is something really wrong with me? I guess I am freak even as a vampire.

"Stop it, Edward! I can't take your depression anymore. More appropriately, we can't take your locked up brooding anymore!" chastised an angry Jasper, followed by a chorus of  _yeses_  emitted by my family.

"Please, let us in, Edward. We are going crazy with your emo shit," he said, using that 'big brother' voice while drilling me with his eyes. How does he do that? It's like I can't help but feel ashamed when he's like this.

"Edward, are you listening to me?" he asked calmly.  _Shit! I am in trouble._

"Yeah… I mean, sorry, I will join you all in a minute," I said.

"Ok, but come fast," he said sternly with a nod.

Groaning, I got up and changed my clothes after a blissful shower. I went down and settled myself on the couch. Strangely, no one was around, so my mind started wandering again and I was once again lost in my thoughts. A tap on my head brought me back to our hall, where all my family members sat on their respective places, with their analyzing stare on the not so normal family member: me.

"Are you alright, son?" asked Carlisle while caressing my face. He is truly like a father- a loving father.

"Am fine," I said, straightening up.

"What's going on. Edward?" It was Esme.

I looked up to find Esme staring at me with a concerned face. "Everything is fine, mom," I said with the intention of easing her mind. It didn't work.

Instead, her face hardened and with an angry voice she started, "Edward Anthony Mason Cullen, if you don't want to get grounded for eternity then spill whatever it is right now. And don't you dare lie to me," she finished. I was thoroughly embarrassed and ashamed of my behavior. I should have told my parents when this all thing started instead.

"I-I am sorry, mom. I was just confused and wasn't sure what your reactions would be, I was…"  _Scared._  Esme finished my line in her mind, and I nodded, looking in her eyes. I wanted her to understand this.

"Fucking say it, Ed," Jasper said. He was struggling with all the out of place emotions in the room.

With a resigned sigh, I stated, "I am in love with Jacob Black, grandson of Ephraim Black. He's my destined mate. " But my parents weren't fazed in the slightest way by the news. They looked like I have just told them something regular. _I mean, come on, you are supposed to look at least a little surprised by my huge revelation._  Did they know about it already? Nah, it's not possible. Maybe they are in shock, but then again vampires can't go into shock.

"Umm… are you in shock?" I asked stupidly. As usual, Emmett started sniggering, with my other siblings following behind. Even Carlisle cracked a smile at my silliness. But everyone got quiet with Esme's glare.

"Why did you asked that, honey?" Mom asked in her usual soft voice.

"I-I thought you would be shocked and disgusted with me after my revelation." I confessed honestly.

With a sad smile Esme rose up from her seat and in an instant, I was engulfed in her arms, before she whispered, "I can never feel like that for my baby boy. How can you even think like that Edward?"

"I am sorry." That was the only thing I could think of and with that, everyone joined on our hug. I felt loved and cherished.

After that, everyone demanded the reason behind my locking myself up the stunt and I finally shared everything with my family.

"After coming back, I just couldn't decide what to do next," I finished, and I can't describe how uncomfortable I was feeling due to the muteness around me.

"Shit dude! That's a fucked up situation." Emmett broke the silence.

"I know." I sighed.

I was still processing all these things when I heard the deep rumbling of Bella's ancient truck.  _That thing should be kept in Museum_. As usual, everyone stiffened. How I didn't notice the strain Bella brought to my family. I guess I was so occupied with our destructive relationship that I just ignored my own family. I can read minds, but still, I didn't even realize the struggle my family was going through. Rosalie told me that we were not compatible, that our bond was volatile, codependent… I- now, I can see what she meant by those harsh words. She wanted me to see the truth, the ugly truth.

Suddenly, I felt anger bubbling inside. Confused, I looked up and realized that Jasper is projecting his emotions. No… Bella's emotions. Sometimes Jasper loses control over prominent emotions. Being an empath is not  _cool_  like many would think.

Two seconds later Bella entered the hall, with that tantalizing fragrance of her blood, Jasper left the room due to the hunger- my hunger.

With a sigh, I got up and turned towards the stairs, but Bella was too impatient and blurted out all the things in front of my family. Well, I am lucky for once.

"Edward, how could you lie about Jacob like that and what is this 'I love you' thing? Why would you do that? Is it some kind of a joke? I knew there was something when you started pulling away… That's why I asked for the breakup. Was Jake the reason? Are you suddenly gay? How could you lie about Jacob's love life…? I never thought you, out of all people, would pull something like that, for… for just to keep me away from Jacob… It didn't work by the way. I asked Jacob and let me spell it for you: HE IS NOT G-A-Y- Gay!" She was shivering and gasping after finishing her little speech.

It took her few seconds, but she really looked pained after realizing her mistake…  _Well, yes, you just shouted about our secret breakup and other –very personal- things, honeybunch._

"Relax, I told them everything," I stated dryly. Bella looked as surprised as my family members did.

 _'What are you planning, Edward. Please think properly before doing anything,'_  whispered Alice in my mind.

I blocked other's thoughts out of my mind, including Alice's for as long as I could.

"Wh-what?" Bella asked after processing this.

"Are you really this slow… I mean, seriously, how difficult is it to understand that I told my family about our breakup?" I scoffed, and with a smirk continued, "...and about my love for Jacob."

Everyone, including Rosalie, were giving me that 'unbelievable' look.

"So you're admitting that you lied to me on purpose?" she asked with glistening eyes.

I sighed and said, "Yes, I lied to you because, I want Jacob and you are the pathetic little human who is in my way," I said with a sneer.

"You are really disgusting, Edward! How could you use me like that?" she shrieked with tears streaming from her eyes.

"I am disgusting? You are the one who always slings along with a group of vampires. I never forced anything upon you, Bella. And if I remember properly you are the one who always forced herself on me. I mean, how can you not realize that someone is not interested in you?" I finished while slumping back on the couch.

"You know what? I am a fool who thought you loved me, a pathetic girl who wanted to have a fucking fairy-tale. I can't believe you used me all along. All that drama with Jake was just so you can talk to him. Right!" She was giving me the same hateful glare that Jacob gave me when he realized I am really a bloodsucking monster. "You are unbelievable, Edward, a sick bastard, a MONSTER." With that, Bella turned and left the room with no other emotion than hate and disgust. I don't need Jasper to know this. I am happy he's here or he would have suffered just because I made a mistake, but now I probably have fixed everything. Bella will never think of me or about our damned relationship ever; she can live a happy life with Jacob now.

With Bella gone, all my defenses broke down and I was bombarded with the thoughts of the people around me. They wanted me to explain what just most prominent amongst them was Alice's:

_'Edward, you know this will affect you greatly. Please don't do this.'_

I want peace right now. I think now is a perfect time to use my other curse.

 _'I want them happy, and they can only be happy without me Ally.'_  I whispered to Alice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it was short in comparison to other chapters but don't worry as the story will start from here and you may get to read more Jacob/Edward chapters.
> 
> Again I will request you to rescue Repercussions from my poor writing and be the beta reader the story. PM me if interested.


	5. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Ahh…I want to but unfortunately I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT!
> 
> A/N: Hey! I know its been awhile but in my defense, I was stuck without my laptop with a shitty internet connection. But I am back!
> 
> Moving ahead I wanted to tell you guys that I am over the moon with the revies and along with regular updates of 'Repercussions' you might get another Jasper/Edward story.

**Epov**

**"We are never so defenseless against suffering as when we are in love." - Sigmund Freud**

One hour… it's been one hour since Bella left this place with a broken heart and to a brighter future. I know Jacob will make her happy and he will provide her everything she deserves. Other than a dull ache in my head, I am feeling nothing.

I don't know what to do anymore… I don't have anything to do. I don't have anyone, why am I even here?

Can I really do this? It was easy to plan things about Jacob and Bella, but I am not sure about anything now. I need to do this though, but I can't see her like this, and Jacob… he will probably kill me after that phone call blunder.  _Death_ , it's so appealing in this situation, but I know it's not an option, maybe later.

I need to control myself; maybe leaving Forks is really a good idea.  _Denali._  Tanya, she will help me, she's really a great friend when she's not in one of her seduction stupors. I can manage to live there; maybe I can explore new places.

"I want to talk." I finally said.

Coming down to my room, I was aware of my family, who were all guarding their mind and sitting in what could be considered an apprehensive way. Emmet unconsciously blocked the main door, while Jasper was sitting in an attacking stance. They were all aware of my decision and I thought I was the telepath.

The moment I reached the center couch Carlisle and Esme were beside me, sitting in between them, I was reminded of my rebellious period. I can understand their desperation to hold onto their first-born son.

"Don't worry; I am just moving out for a few years, I will stay with Denali clan. I will come back after our next move." I said while embracing my panicked Mother.

"Why? I mean, why move suddenly like this? We can sort things with Bella and Jacob. Edward stops running from your problems." Alice said with a scowl.

"Alice, Yes, I am running, but only because I don't want to stay here and  _enjoy_  seeing my mate with someone else. It's difficult for me, I know I said that I will stay by their side and look after them, but I can't do it. And right now it's probably best for all of us if I leave for Denali. I promise I will try my best to overcome this, whatever it is and come back to all of you, I can't even imagine living, without my family so don't worry, it's just a phase." I said, more to myself than others.

"I think, I think Edward is right." It was Rosalie, people may think of her as someone who hates my guts, but she is also the one who knows me closely.

"But, baby how you will manage everything alone, without us," Esme said with glistening eyes, though it's impossible for a vampire but looking at her…

"Mom, don't worry, I am a big boy now," I said jokingly, that got a smile from her and of course teasing from Emmett.

"Okay, son, I trust you and your judgment," Carlisle said in a resigned voice.  _I am going to Alaska._

~oo0oo~

Snow, white and cold, many would say that ice is beautiful, but I say it's deadly. The sky is full of stars and I am currently surrounded by sharp wind, it's soothing to just lie down in the soft and cold snow and revel in the vibrations of different sounds coming from the forest. I was still enjoying the music around me when my heightened sense was jolted by the smell of a foreign predator; hmm… time to enjoy a meal. I was on my feet before thinking and my legs started moving towards the smell of fresh blood, aah… it feels so good to just let go of all the pretense and worries.

I was about to tackle the feasting bear when someone came in my area of prey…  _kill it_.

 _Need to kill that intruder before it gets to my prey, that bear is mine, and mine alone._  I was growling low in my chest, giving the intruder a warning before my attack. A female, stopping in a clearing I sniffed again…  _Tanya._

"Now- now Eddie, why so grouchy? Don't you love me?" Said a voice is a sultry way.

"Go away!" I snarled.

With that, Tanya entered the clearing in a black frilly dress, showing off her assets she started approaching me with gleaming eyes and a lazy smile.

I growled again, and then I saw a figure- me, with disheveled hairs, shredded clothes and bared teeth's that were glistening under the moon…  _a predator, a vampire._

Tanya was more than attracted to this unbarred demon. She was approaching me with naked desire. A moment and I was on my back, with her fierce lips on me, she was growling at my lack response. With her momentary slide, I grabbed her waist and reversed our position; she immediately locked her ankles around my waist and whined due to the lack of connection. There was no doubt that she is one the most beautiful girl I have seen, and to anyone else, having her like this would have been a dream, but for me, it did nothing other than dissolving all predatory haze I was in.

"What do you want Tanya?" I asked irritably.

She was still staring at me with half-lidded eyes and her cold breaths were tickling my lips, suddenly she raised herself and took my lips once again in her mouth, it wasn't…  _romantic_ , in fact, it was comforting. But all the while I was kissing her I couldn't help with the sick feeling of something wrong that was rising from the pit of my stomach.  _Stop it!_  It took me probably 2-3 seconds before I realized that I was panting clutching my chest about six meters away from my distraught  _friend,_ feeling like I have committed the biggest sin in the world.

I was panicking, I knew it was impossible to do so, but I was feeling like all these emotions will consume me, it felt like drowning underwater, dark and overwhelming, where there was no one around. I wanted to cry, but I couldn't do anything other than whimpering in a pathetic way, as a prisoner caged in a closed up cell. For the first time in my damned existence, I felt like I was dying.

I could feel Tanya's voice calling for me, but I just couldn't react, my body was betraying me, my whole system was protesting against me, they wanted me to suffer and I was suffering. It felt like an eternity, but finally, I started registering my surroundings, I was resting against Tanya, who was cradling me and muttering something, probably a prayer in her native language. It was surreal for me, her foreign words, I mean I was fluent in many languages, including hers, but right now, it was like a low hum confusing but comforting. It felt nice, I just wanted to curl up against her and cry, and so I just did. I was shaking violently with my loud and dry sobs, but Tanya only tightened her grip around me and kept rocking me slowly in her lap. I just cried, for my loss, ache and pain. I don't know how long I gripped onto her, but finally, I was quiet. The only thing that broke the silence around us was Tanya's voice.

"You found your mate." It was a statement rather than a question, but I still nodded weakly against her chest.

With a sigh, she motioned us to get up and I was about to untangle myself from her, but with a look, she grabbed my hand and ceased all my movements. And after a sudden crusade, I was cradled by a woman, who was shorter than me by 4 inches, talk about humiliation. I couldn't help but laugh at the image we were creating; I mean we were looking completely ridiculous. Tanya joined my laughter and it was then it clicked, she did this purposely. How I wish I could to have someone like her as my mate.

Sensing my gaze Tanya looked down, still smiling.

' _What?'_

"Nothing, just thinking about the way to get out of your clutches," I said with a mock horror on my face.

"Neveeer!" She shouted and started running toward Denali house still cradling me in her arm. We were both laughing hysterically as I tried futilely to squirm out her arms on the way. Sigh, I am in for a merciless teasing from the great Denali Coven.

~oo0oo~

While laughing at an animatedly dancing Tanya, I won't admit, but she is doing a rather impressive job at mimicking Michael Jackson but it's still funny when done with a piano. I am currently playing a pleasant piece because Tanya loves it when I play something for her, 'It's romantic' she would say when asked about it. But I know it's one of her ways of distracting me from my pain. Tanya too is a proficient piano player, but she exclaims that she doesn't stand a chance against me, but according to me, she's really good as a piano player.

After the clearing episode, as I like to call it, Tanya kept things normal between us. She still sometimes looks at me with longing when she thinks I am not paying attention but all in all she has backed off. And I can't believe how close we have got in just three months. It's been six months since I left Forks and while I am not exultant, I am good. Honestly, I can't think living here without Tanya though she's my stone. She's truly my best friend, I mean I am close to family, but they don't exactly know how living without a mate feels, Tanya gets me like that. We can understand and accompany each other unlike the mated couples around us.

Tanya is too the only unmated member of Denali coven, Carmen is with Eleazor, Kate is with Garret, even Irina has found someone, she is currently away with her mystery man, Tanya is a little upset with her for diapering like that but she's happy for her. So now, she's the only one who is single and miserable around happy and mated couples- just like me.

I was still playing the music when my phone went off.

' _I will get it!'_

I blinked in response; another thing that has developed between us is this easy conversation. Only Alice and I share this kind of bond…I don't know how Alice will react to this. Let's say Tanya is not someone Alice would share anything, especially if it's something close to her. Due to Tanya's adventurous nature and succubus abilities, poor Jasper suffered a great deal once when Alice found them embracing each other in a not so innocent way. I didn't realize I was chuckling until Tanya nudged me with a raised eyebrow.

"Jasper…" I uttered, and we both started laughing, recollecting the incident.

"Really, I never saw Jasper that scared again, he was like a deer caught in head lights," I choked out between my giggling fit.

"Hey, I loved how Pixie looked when she saw us together, I swear her eyeball was about to fall out of her sockets," Tanya said while sharing the exact memory with me, honestly, it did look like that. My jovial mood was shattered when I finally checked my mobile.

"What happened?" Tanya was by my side after she noticed the change in atmosphere.

"Victoria is back…" I stuttered

While Tanya cursed under her breath, the only thing I could think of was 'why god?'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gah! I really just want our boys to kiss and makeup but they just won't listen to me!

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! so how's it? and what about Bella? will she confess her true feelings to Edward?


End file.
